As a kid, I looked forward to the yearly trip to the circus. It just so happened it traveled to North Carolina the week of my birthday – a double win.
I can still smell the pungent odor of elephants, taste the popcorn, the sight of bodies soaring effortlessly through the air, seats filled with families waiting with anticipation for the next big moment. It was a thrilling roller coaster of emotions, from excitement to fear to astonishment.
More than 20 years later, these memories are still deeply ingrained in my mind. This wouldn’t be the case if I went to a big tent of people seated in a circle peering at an empty space where the entertainment should be.
So, would you pay for the experience to sit in an oversized circular tent with a few thousand other people and no entertainment? I doubt it. This analogy translates to weddings as well. While it’s quite possible to invite your loved ones to your backyard and connect your phone to a sound system to play your favorite iTunes playlist, it's likely not the experience you’ve been dreaming of since childhood.
There’s a lot of moving parts necessary to make your wedding day a success. From the venue to catering, to the DJ and the photographer and videographers who preserve your memories for a lifetime of enjoyment, our goal is to make your special day an experience you and your guests will love to relive.
As a wedding filmmaker, I have the privilege of capturing all these components in a way that honors the essence of your day. Even I must admit, it would be a chore trying to create the excitement of the day without capturing the beauty of the venue, you gazing into the eyes of your love while stating your vow to them, the DJ heightening the energy playing your favorite songs, the taste of the food and cake.
All of that said to reiterate the fact that vendors are there to make life easier and the experiences grander. Maybe this is why I have a difficult time understanding the complaints I’ve seen from a few brides who are totally against feeding their vendors.
Before diving into my response for this, I’d be remiss if I didn’t show some empathy. I get it. Weddings are a costly investment, and catering is typically the second largest expense. Having to feed vendors may feel like an added expense you can live without.
Here are a few things to consider when deciding if you want to provide meals for vendors:
• Majority of vendors will spend upwards of 9 hours or more with you on location.
• Certain vendors, like myself, have to load and unload gear, some of which can total over 100 pounds.
• We typically do not have time to take breaks. The only break we get is when everyone sits for dinner.
• Venue guidelines often restrict us from storing food in their refrigerators, and it’s not safe to leave a packed lunch in the car for six or more hours until dinner is served.
• Most venues aren’t located near restaurants. This means being off location for at least an hour to find food compared to a 20-minute break if a meal is provided.
• The most important thing to note is the vendor’s contract. Many vendor contracts include a clause stipulating the provision of a hot meal when they’re on location for six or more hours.
Still on the fence? Let me walk you through a day as a wedding filmmaker.
My day as your wedding filmmaker begins when you sign the contract. And for those days, believe it or not, I feed myself. But let’s get to the actual wedding day.
My preparations for your big day begin the day before. Ensuring my gear is packed and ready. I have a checklist of gear based on your needs and backup gear so that I’m prepared in the event something stops working.
On the wedding day, I typically arrive 2-3 hours before the ceremony to access the venue, unpack, and setup gear. For the next 5-6 hours, I’m walking around with 20 pounds of equipment, capturing all your special moments. At some point, we’re going to end up outside whether it’s for your ceremony or we’re going out for bridal party or family photos. If it’s summer, my energy depletes at a faster rate. By the time we get to the reception, I’ve made it through the first half of the day with no breaks. And with carrying an additional 20 pounds, I’m drained and in need of an energy boost.
Now, let me be clear. None of this is a statement of complaint. I love filming weddings, and generally, I’m running on adrenaline, so I don’t notice the loss of energy until things slow down. Unless it's 90+ degrees and I’ve been climbing hills and stairs for over an hour.
You can imagine my relief when we start the reception, make it through the first dances, and start serving dinner and finally get some time for a bathroom and food break. After being on my feet for 6 hours straight, I guarantee you I’d rather receive a meal on location than have the added stress of having to find food. Plus, instead of being offsite for an hour, I’m onsite, able to take a 20-minute break and get back to work for your next big moments.
All this to say, while it may cost a little more upfront to feed your vendors, it is an investment you’ll want to make. Not only is it proper etiquette, but it also keeps morale up. And if that doesn’t help, weigh the costs of having to extend your time at the venue an additional hour or two to accommodate vendors having to find food. The cost of extending the time at the venue to ensure all the big events were captured would cost far more than simply feeding your vendors.
As I mentioned in the opening, weddings are expensive. I get it! I don’t blame you for wanting to save money wherever you can. But please, don’t skimp out on providing meals for your vendors. If you want to get the best experience from your vendors, remember we’re humans too. Treat us with the decency you’d like to be treated with if you were in our shoes.
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